Sarcasm Central

Grab your dose of Retro humour right here………

 

Maybe I use sarcasm fluently based on the kaz’ (people have been known to refer to me as that!) in the pronunciation, but for whatever reason I find it a useful tool when dealing with life’s ‘tools’!

So now your wondering who I am referring to as ‘tools’? Those with small minds and large opinions!  Everything if you like, in ‘black and white’, they know everything and you cant give them any advice they need!  See that’s where I like to use a little sarcasm, to help them along the way….:)

Interestingly though sarcasm and sarcastic people are looked upon as possible ‘passive aggressors’ trying to ‘mock, ridicule &/or hurt others’ due to a number of reasons in their own lives!  Find out more from KSL.com and their article on this!

Wow!  what is my problem then and why do I find myself using sarcasm to get through my days?  I don’t feel like I use if for evil but more for humour and candid comments to sometimes point out the ‘bleeding obvious’ to my hubby or children!  They have to know sometimes and this way I feel I am breaking it to them in a way they understand and feel comfortable with. Maybe as I have brought them up this way they aren’t affected.

In my working life though and as a people manager I do take care I am not using sarcasm to get a point across, at those times it is a face to face discussion about the issue or problem, no mincing my words, straight out with it but always surrounding the message with some positives as well – the constructive sandwich solution!  I found a great read recently @ Personal Excellence.co on this old concept!

So for the time being I am happy to continue to use sarcasm to get a point across where needed and love these wonderful Retro posters I love sharing with my family and friends; I often find myself collecting cards with either Sarcasm or Retro themes as well, “another collection” my hubby would say, but I just love all this stuff…!

 

sarcasm

ˈsɑːkaz(ə)m/

noun

  1. the use of irony to mock or convey contempt.

    “she didn’t like the note of sarcasm in his voice”

    synonyms: derision, mockery, ridicule, satire, irony, scorn, sneering, scoffing, gibing, taunting;

    trenchancy, mordancy, acerbity;
    rarecausticity, mordacity
    “his voice was heavy with sarcasm”

 

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Retro63 (aka Kaz)

 

 

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Psychic Cat?

 So middle daughter’s best friend (let’s call her BF) is very well-known, you might say renowned for being ‘clumsy’!  Not by a little bit but by the whole box and dice! She is like a cat with 13 lives, not nine!!!

Not a psychic cat, otherwise she would know when to ‘duck and weave’ or to ‘stay home with the doona pulled over her head’!  I’ll get to the psychic cat though, read on.

BF has had numerous breaks to her bones, dislocations, scratches, bruises and cuts.  From a young girl to now she remains, clumsy – there is no other word for it!  In saying that though, she is one of the most pettiest young ladies I know and she has given me moments of amusement, concern and downright amazement with the stories of injuries and mishaps she encounters!

Just to name a few……

  1.  Broken wrists (both at the same time) from running down a driveway and smacking into her mum’s car at the bottom, ouch!  X-rays later and both wrists in plaster (approximately aged 9) – I still have the picture in my mind of her trying to open our front door with her broken wrists, wrapping them both around the door knob, to no effect, door remained closed!! Plaster and round door knobs don’t work!!
  2.  Dislocated shoulder – youth group gymnastics, jumped from one cube to another, all the other kids did it easily but no, BF fell between the cubes, missed all the safety mats and smacked into the basketball court floor – hard!  One Dr’s visit later, sling with arm immobilised due to shoulder dislocation, approximate age, 10.
  3. Sitting on a hill (1 of four girls there) – no-one around them for at least 600 metres on all sides and front and back – young boys let car tyre off from top of hill – at least 500 metres to the left of where the girls sit – you guessed it – the tyre veered off course and, yes you are correct – it hit her smack on her back and knocked her ass over head!! No real injuries to report, bruising, swelling and for the rest of us, saw ribs from laughing so loud and so long, you did have to be there to appreciate it though – classic!  approximate age, 15.

Anyway you get the picture,,, there is so much more to write but so little time (I am getting older by the minute)!  And, we need to get to the psychic cat?

Psychic Cat Dead People and Tuna Pic

So,  just like middle daughter, BF is now nearly thirty!  Has her luck changed you ask?  No!  but she still has some great stories that happen to and around her…take the story of psychic cat – imagine if you will, best friend – a nursing home – a cat – elderly residents and the end of life!

BF now a qualified carer starts her new career in an aged care home – loves it, loves the patients and find she has a real knack for the industry; always smiling and making the residents happy, telling them stories of her adventures or should that be accidents?

BF was amazed at how happy the homes pet cat made the residents and found it a really awesome subject to talk about. That was until she became aware of the cats abilities!? Yes you’re right, she had met psychic cat!  

BF had returned to work from a few days off to find a resident she had become fond of had passed on, and when asking her colleagues for the details she was astounded to hear them state, “they should have realised it was her time as the cat had spent the last 2 – 3 days asleep on her bed!”  BF asked what they meant only to be told of numerous stories about the cat and its visits to residents in the days prior to their demise!  BF couldn’t believe it, thinking they were having a lend of her initially but with more and more stories and examples of this she realised the cat knew whose time was up.

BF decided to steer clear of the cat from here on in, do you blame her?  With her track record of being in the wrong place at the wrong time, it would be safer! You couldn’t argue with that, could you?

Psychic Cat - Yikes, No Make-up!!

So, moving on and now really interested in this phenomenon BF is so mystified by, I found (with trusty Google) there is evidence of a cats ability to be psychic! What you talkin’ about Willis, I hear you say!!??

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Oscar (born 2005) is a therapy cat living in the Steere House Nursing and Rehabilitation Center in Providence, Rhode Island, United States. He came to public attention in July 2007 when he was featured in an article by David Dosa, a geriatrician and assistant professor at Brown University, in the New England Journal of Medicine. According to Dosa, Oscar appears able to predict the impending death of terminally ill patients.” 

“After about six months, the staff noticed that Oscar, just like the doctors and nurses, would make his own rounds. Oscar would sniff and observe patients, then curl up to sleep with certain ones. The patients he would sleep with often died within several hours of his arrival.”

“Oscar’s accuracy (which stood at more than 25 consecutive reported instances when the NEJM article was written) led the staff to institute a new and unusual protocol: once he is discovered sleeping with a patient, staff will call family members to notify them of the patient’s (expected) impending death.”

For the full Wikipedia story on Oscar, a movie and a rock band go to Oscar (therapy cat) – this is an interesting and intriguing read!

But wait there is more!! You can also watch Oscar on Youtube

BEWARE!

Wow!  There is such a thing as psychic cat after all? Get out of here, who would have thought?  BF really does have something to be wary of!!

Now, which one of the two do you think, BF or psychic cat is in the most danger?

  1. Scenario one, BF wakes up and psychic cat is asleep on her knee during her shift or,
  2. Scenario two, psychic cat sustains minor injuries when BF inadvertently trips over him whilst checking beds during a night shift??

Send a comment and let me know what you think?

Retro63

 

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Laugh, just laugh out loud

Life_Family_Fun

I’ve always found in life you must retain a sense of humour, have fun and laugh often! You have to be ready to laugh at a moments notice and sometimes, at the most inappropriate times! Church, at the doctors, parent teacher meetings, business meetings and the worst one, at a funeral, just to name a few!

Often it’s my ability to find humorous moments throughout the day that gets me through life!

I love a good laugh and particularly at myself ! Laughing at myself and often is a given and is heaps and heaps of fun!

Life is and can be quite hard at times, even though I am sure it’s not supposed to be and maybe we make it harder by over thinking every aspect of our lives and life choices and we don’t laugh enough!

Emotions are tweaked each day, smiling, laughing and crying are all regular responses to how you’re feeling!

There are no rules on how you cope with certain situations or feelings and everyone’s reactions will be different and thank goodness for that!  The world is unique based on those differences and again, thank goodness for that!

I want to share some of the fun times and hilarious days I have had being a wife, mother, grandmother, people manager and now carer – my days are varied and sprinkled with emotional moments, and how I cope with those enable me to regret less, love more and laugh and smile often (very) 🙂

Current FUN addictionMinions

Minion_Fun Iam Short

 Minions_Fun doing nothingMinions_Fun back away

& Retro Quotes!Retro_Fun sarcasm


Retro_Fun sleep in no regret
Retro_Fun expert advice

Laugh, Just Laugh out Loud Grumpy Cat           Laugh, Just Laugh out Loud Grumpy Cat Image 3Laugh, Just Laugh out Loud Grumpy Cat Image 2

and who can forget the unforgettable Grumpy Cat! 

Love to hear what gets you through your day?

Retro63

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My Brain!

 

Why is it I seem to think things through in a kind of weird way! Apparently that is? Whenever I think about things I have, again apparently, a unique way of doing it and when explaining what I thought, youngest daughter particularly can’t believe My Brain thinks that way!  I believe I am quite normal but based on her theory, I am quite the opposite!

My Brain

For instance, tonight I state I thought about being on a cruise, we have been joking with Mother about her going on one (she can afford it), so I was thinking about it and in fact think I may have had a dream the previous night where I was upset as I thought about being on the cruise and then mysteriously falling from the boat!  Wow, not a nice thought, especially if you don’t die before hitting the water or on impact!  Floating out there and watching the biggest boat you have ever seen leaving the scene of your fall at, what I expect to be at exaggerated speed, can’t be trip you were dreaming of or reading in the brochures.  How could you cope I asked Mother and youngest daughter, stating you would be worrying about being left there to just die, floating and not knowing which way to swim!  Or would you have to make the decision to attempt to drown yourself?

Youngest daughter just rolled her eyes and stated, I can’t believe you think about that stuff, no-one else would think like that!  I do, and I believe it is the way a majority of ‘normal’ people think each and every day, although!

 

 

It made me realise I may not be as optimistic about things as I believe I am?  I tend to think a lot about morbid details of potentially ‘bad’, ‘really bad’ stuff happening for all types of reasons.

After my knee injury and followed by the ACL tear I constantly  thought about falling but would actually see it happening in my head, I could pretty much see the fall and the aftermath! Body flailing around on the ground, trying to find something to hold onto to get myself back up again – similar sight I would suggest to the re-floating of a boat that has sunk – see now you’re getting it,,,,then the Titanic would come into my head and the most memorable moments in that movie, “Jack, Jack!”, “Rose, Rose!” (being shouted over and over again above the sound of running, gushing water)!!  Joking, I did love the movie although oldest grandchild, who was youngest and only grandchild back then did nearly ruin it for me, he had to watch it over and over again (ad nauseam!) – interestingly nothing changed, the boat hit the iceberg and sank, dear Jack didn’t survive, but again – I need you to know I did like the movie, not knocking it in any way 🙂 just was a tad sick of it by the time my grandson had moved onto a new movie to drive me mad with!

Our family seems to have been blessed with good luck and good health, not to put a mocker on it but we have, and sometimes I am led to believe in My Brain it is because I play out a lot of bad things that could happen based on what we are doing or going to do or what activity the kids were doing or are involved in; they are like mini ‘real life’ dramas or comedies in most cases, played out in my head in full.

Scenario 1,  eldest daughter rides her horse in the cross-country these are the things that could happen, she forgets which way to go and starts going down a one-way track, the wrong way! Eldest daughter hits a tree or horse shies at the tree, or worse than that they hit an oncoming horse and rider!

Scenario 2 middle daughter runs amok on roller derby rink, skates were serviced before the comp and she cannot stop herself, she takes out the refs and the guy and gal who are there to provide the half time entertainment + she barrels into the kiosk – spilling all the drinks and running over the chips, with grease on her wheels she is out into the car park before running into the back of a parked car!

Scenario 3 eldest son on down hill bike ride in the Canadian mountains – news bulletin, young Aussie downhill bike rider gets more than he expected when yogi and the bear accompany him down the mountain, yogi on the handlebars and bear on the young Aussies knee, he was taken to hospital for minor bite wounds, now even I admit this one is really off the charts for My Brain! but in saying that he does mountain bike ride and yes, he has told me “he takes his life in his own hands”, riding in the mountains with brown bears roaming around!

Scenario 4 youngest daughter whilst studying at Uni and living away from home, is talking to me on the phone when getting home from a late lecture, walks in the door of rented property, its dark and supposedly her room mates aren’t home yet, she talks to me whilst locking up and as she heads up to the stairs someone jumps out of the dark, she screams, I scream and ask her who’s there, she says its someone wanting money, I say put them on the phone and before i know it my voice has dropped an octave or two and I am Liam Neeson in my favourite movie, Taken – I tell them I have a certain set of skills and if you hurt youngest daughter, I will find you and I will kill you! In My Brain, they give the phone back to youngest daughter and leave without hurting her, although in reality they are screaming “your mum is an f*#$%@g weird, crazy woman”, and they’re not staying for the surprise dress up birthday party for room-mate # 2 who wasn’t home yet!  Oops, can’t believe they hadn’t seen Taken, who hasn’t seen that movie? As if I was for real, they should have known it was a joke! 🙂

See I can run off track and run amok when my mind really wants to test out some theories but in saying that and for the moral of this story and above paragraph (at least) nothing too sinister or bad has happened and I firmly believe that’s because I thought it all out and am wary and cautious of what could happen, hence I prepare myself and my family for anything to happen and luckily it hasn’t happened! Confused, I am! Yikes!!

I think I will though, keep using my brain this way as it has kept us out of trouble to this point – I will also keep you updated on My Brain and its antics from the past and future….I am sure it will be slightly amusing or at least weird, although I believe there will be a huge number of people who think exactly like me – normally that is 🙂

 

Retro63

 

 

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